prettylady_2

Everything Changes.

Mon, 28 Dec 2009 02:59:56 GMT

How are you suppose to know when things are meant to end?
I continue to come bck to you and then I find myself asking why,
I continue to upset myself and hurt myself over and over,
I don't understand why I do this to myself, it makes no sense,
We just do fine for a week, then it goes bck to the same shit.
If you could just learn to forgive me, then I could learn to feel.

Never would have guessed.

Sun, 22 Nov 2009 17:55:31 GMT

This would happen to me, just blows my mind.
My life here lately has become a big hurricane.
I finally get a vacation this week, get to
just relax finally, I need it very much.
I need new things.

You don't even know.

Fri, 02 Oct 2009 18:25:01 GMT

I don't know wht my deal is about you,
But for some reason I'm trippin over you.
I just really hope tht I'm not setting myself up to be hurt.
I really hope things work with us, and I hope you honestly like me.
I just wish you would let the fact tht I went out with Jp go,
It wasn't anything serious, and I know it hurt you, but its
getting to the point to were its annoying now, & I'm still sorry.
So lets take things nice and slow and do this right.

Driving myself insane.

Thu, 17 Sep 2009 05:32:50 GMT

Sometimes you do things I don't understand,
Like honestly how can you not see me when
I'm like 20 feet away from you? It like
when its just me and you, You are so sweet,
But sometimes when other people are around its
like I'm not even there. Its weird. But you know
I'm not even going to trip over it.

Anymore.

Mon, 14 Sep 2009 03:31:43 GMT

I just dont have the strength anymore.
You are always a dayy too late.
Now tht you want me, I'm moving on,
Now you finally see and it's too late,
and you wish you had me bck.
Cold-hearted words to say to the one
tht gave tht heart you took away.
Love here was so strong, but now
its all dead and gone.

Breathe.

Tue, 01 Sep 2009 02:30:15 GMT

Nothing we say is going to save us from the fall out.
We always have to go through the bed times to get too the good,
We always have to get hurt and broken, so someone else can put us bck together,
We always have to go through life wondering whts going to go wrong next,
We always will some how pull through and be put bck together,
But when, when does tht happen??
I wish someone would show me the way,
Lead me to the good,
I feel like I've been stuck in this bad time for days, months, and years.
I dont get why you would walk away and leave,
but then you call me wanting to see me wanting to talk to me,
we could have talked if you didn't walk away,
You kill me inside so much, but you will never see tht part.

Vacation

Fri, 14 Aug 2009 03:05:45 GMT

Well unfortunately this has not been wht I hoped for,
It has been well not so freaking great,
History lessons, Gloomy beach sittings,
Raining while you are trying to do a tour,
Speeches about you need to go to college and blah blah.
Not my ideal of a vacation, no laying out on
the beach or by the pool getting tan.

I have two days left then I can go bck home,
To driving and going when I please, working,
and seeing the people tht I would really like to be with.

Gotta be strong.

Sat, 08 Aug 2009 19:22:16 GMT

Yes I want to be with you but thats sort-of hard when my parents wont allow it and I wont hide things I've done it before and it doens't work out, it gets old very fast and annoying.

& I honestly dont see how you expect me to look at you the same after what you did a week ago. Yes I forgive you but I can't just completely erase that it happened.

I hide my feelings well and I know seeing you will break them free and I dont want that I would rather just ignore them or deal with them by myself. We can not be together now its just not going to work, not even a week from now, maybe months or even in a year when I'm 18 and can do as I wish, but not now.

I wish you would just sit and think about things in my shoes, but you are so concerned about yourself that you can't even consider my side of things. I know I've hurt you in the past many time but all of the things I did too you added up dont amount to what you did to me, to us.

I'm sorry but this has to be our goodbye.

My life story.

Mon, 27 Jul 2009 03:41:37 GMT

Theres always something different going wrong,
the path I walk is in the wrong direction.
(Story of my life)

I don't even know who I am anymore,
Everything always goes wrong,
nothing ever works,
I always fail.

Incomplete

Tue, 21 Jul 2009 22:46:29 GMT

Empty spaces fill me up with holes
Distant faces with no place left to go
Without you, within me I can find no rest

I try to imagine me without you and all
that crosses my mind is I can't live
I have nothing left inside of me, to continue
on, to continue to breathe, I have nothing
to move on for, Tonight I should die, I have
nothing left.

ughh.

Sun, 19 Jul 2009 20:17:17 GMT

Why do I even try,
why do i put myself through this,
everyday, all the time.

Trust

Thu, 16 Jul 2009 03:15:14 GMT

Its completely vanished in my life,
I be honest and I'm not believed,
I dont lie and I actually ask you
to go where I'm actually going and
you tell me no but you know that when
I ask you to stay somewhere else you
supposely know where I'm going and you
say yeah when I tell you a lie and you
even know its a lie, I don't understand it.

I guess I will just lie and you will say yes,
Thts so fucking stupid, Nothing in my life
makes sense to me, people are so stupid.

Tue, 14 Jul 2009 19:05:39 GMT

I'm strong on the surface, not all the way through.
Once again we are going through this,
Once again we are back to this,
Once again I screwed up,
Once again I hurt you,
Once again you can't trust me,
Once again you are being a complete ass,
Once again, once again, once again.

Nothing seems to go right,
Nothing seems to last,
Nothing is the same,
Everything is fading,
Everything is back to square one.

Fri, 26 Jun 2009 19:49:46 GMT

Today has been very long.
Last day of summer school,
Came home and laid out,
Took a shower, ate, and read.
I've sat waiting to hear something from you,
The love of my life, My Fiance since June 21, 2009,
I understand now how you feel when you wait for me at
night to get off of work it's very annoying and sad.
I've realized that without you I couldn't even think
to continue to breathe to keep myself alive. I trust you
with my life, I love you with all of my heart and soul,
I want you to be by my side forever, I need you more
than I have ever needed anything, baby I breathe you, never
ever leave you, life wouldn't be the same without you.

A part of me...

Wed, 11 Mar 2009 19:19:14 GMT

Wants to be with you but only a small part. & for the other part I just need you to let go. You are just pushing me away more and more. & you don't even realize it. You can't make me talk to you. I'm going to do what I want too no matter what. If you don't like it then leave. My goal is too make myself happy. & right now thats not what I'm getting being with you.

Obession

Wed, 25 Feb 2009 22:01:40 GMT

You are becoming a little too obesssive. I'm feeling overcrowded. I want to do my own thing sometimes and not always be around you. I don't want to talk to you all the time or text you constantly. I'm feeling that I might need a slight break from all of this. It's becoming too much.

Space

Wed, 18 Feb 2009 20:45:15 GMT

I just need some space to breathe. I feel over crowed at all times. & it seems like I can't do anything you approve of. I have my own opinions and I make my own choices. I'll wear what I want and do what I feel is needed. I don't want to lose you but I just want you to not be so crowding.

I hate this part.

Sat, 14 Feb 2009 01:27:17 GMT

I need some excitement in my life. I'm tired of the same old things. I need new people and new things too try out. Could someone please save me from this. I just need something new. Anything at all. Or maybe I just need to realize what I have right in front of me. I'm not sure but I just really want to know. I'm sick of guessing and thinking. I want my own things, my own house with my own things in it, my own car the way I like it. I need something different, something new. I need to spice up this life of mine.

Answers?

Tue, 27 Jan 2009 03:09:21 GMT

I fucking hate the way I am. I always do this and then I always fuck everything up. Why can't I just accept the fact that someone actually loves me. Why did I have to go through all the stupid bullshit to make me this way. What did i do to deserve this?? I just want to cry and I just don't know. I want to get away from all this shit that I keep putting myself in. Why can't I just keep my mouth shut and pretend that everything is okay??Why do I have to ruin everything that's good?? Someone please explain to me, because I don't have answers anymore.

Phases.

Tue, 20 Jan 2009 05:38:24 GMT

I'm not sure why you go through these phases were you hate me and then you love me.
You always realize you lost what you need when you don't have it anymore.
I'm sorry but I can't put myself through it anymore.
I've gave you way too many chances,
I always get screwed over in the end,
Why would I put myself through it again,
Yes you were my first love and I won't forget that,
But you need to realize I'm not going to jump when you tell me to.
I'm happy with where I am right now,
& until that changes,
Your chances are very low.

Failure

Fri, 16 Jan 2009 16:18:23 GMT

I'm becoming a failure, I failed my US History exam. I don't know what is wrong with me. I just want to scream.

You found me.

Fri, 02 Jan 2009 20:59:18 GMT

My head is in the wrong place right now. & I'm thinking about things I shouldn't be. I keep finding myself listening to the same sad songs over and over. I keep telling myself it wont be like this for long. It will go away in a week or two. Am I really where I need to be?? I keep getting annoyed by the smallest things. I don't understand why I'm acting this way......

Backk.

Sun, 28 Dec 2008 15:32:44 GMT

I'm bck in town and I couldn't be happier. My life is being put bck together again. My heart is being refilled with all of it's joy and happiness. It starts today. All the craziness. Going bck to work, bck to school in about a week. Exams are coming up, the semester is coming to an end as well as the 2008 year. I'm ready for it all, so hit me with your best shot.

True Colors

Tue, 16 Dec 2008 04:34:17 GMT

You showed them very well tonight. I'm not sure how you get everything is my fault, but wht do I know, anyways?? Apparently wht everyone else does, doesn't even matter, because it's all my fucking fault, right?? Well thts wht you think anyways. Everyone is filling your head full of straight bullshit. But you wont take a fucking second and think about things. It's laid out in front of you plain and fucking clear, but you just don't get it. I hope you realize tht if you leave things the way they are right now, I'm not going to be around much longer. I'm done with the fucking lies and all the stupid immature fucking bullshit. So if you want this to be forever like we have said, then get your shit together. You know how to get a hold of me.

Amazinggg.

Sat, 06 Dec 2008 00:56:31 GMT

Everything is going completely great. I've got my priorities straight, I have an amazing boyfriend, and he means the world to me. I have my friends back and things are so amazingg. I went through a rough period of time with you and I'm done with tht and I'm glad. You had me all messed up. But thts okay, cause I will always pull myself together through anything. I'm bck on my feet and I wont let you see me fall ever again.

So thanks for proving my point and I hope you have a wonderful life, and enjoy the things you do and the people you have in your life, cause if you keep it up like you did with me, everyone else will walk out on you too. Just so you know.

hahahaha :]]